What does cats and festival attendees have in common?

They both love using the toilet right after it's been cleaned.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How does a virgin pop her cherry?

by using a bottle opener

What is something you can use to find the pH of tree sap?

A log!

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

How many dead bodies do I have to leave on the porch before they acknowledge me?

Cats

What happens when you pet a cat in the opposite direction?

You rub them the wrong way

Toilet Jokes More Toilet Jokes

Why can't you tell when a Pteradactyl goes to the toilet?

Because the P is silent.

How do you surprise Helen Keller?

Leave the plunger in the toilet

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why do hipsters love Raiders of the Lost Ark?

Because it's the first Indy movie.

What did the Asian guy say when he was caught sleeping with another man's wife?

Me love you wrong time.

Clean Jokes More Clean Jokes

What did the mexican boy say to his mom after he mopped the floors and found his brother?

I've cleaned up and found Jesus.

Which service do you require?

Me: Oh! Don't mind me, I was just cleaning cake off the touch screen.