What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What says "Mark! Mark! Mark! Mark! Mark!" ?

A dog with a hair lip

What kind of dog is the most colorful?

A paint Bernard!

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why did the table love playing volleyball?

Because it was always getting set! I think she gets it from her mother.

What's Justin Bieber's favorite make of car?

Voltz-swaggin. I thought of this myself and I am so, so sorry.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What kind of Mechanics fix and break your car at the same time?

Quantum Mechanics.

What does a dyslexic,agnostic and insomniac spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night thinking if there really is a dog

Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both spent a fortune making their noses more white.

Why didn't you report your stolen credit card?

Man: The thief was spending less than my wife. Police: Then why are you reporting it now Man: I think now the thief's wife has started using it!

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why did the artists stay away from the irritable blacksmith?

Nobody wanted to draw his iron.

How do you stay hidden in the Desert?

Camal-Flage

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What does the Doctor say on a one-night stand going wrong?

It's bigger on the inside(http://www.youtube.com/watch v=6zXDo4dL7SU)

What does a mentally disabled lizard said to be diagnosed with?

A Reptile Dysfunction *ba dum tss* I'll be here all night folks