What do a washing machine and a one night stand have in common?

a washing machine doesn't follow you around for a week after you put a load in it..

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Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What's the difference between an 18yo and a washing machine?

You can dump your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you round for two weeks telling you it loves you

What's the difference between a girl and a washing machine?

When I dump a load into the washing machine it doesn't follow me around

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night?

He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.

What lights up a football pitch at night?

A football match.......

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

What do you call a pirate who intentionally sets a fire at sea?

An arrrrrsonist. Thank you. I'll be here all week.

What's a nuns favorite day of the week?

Sununday.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What is the difference between a washing machine and a girl?

A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it.

How do you make a computer your best friend?

You buy it a nice bunch of software and get it loaded!

Night Stand Jokes More Night Stand Jokes

What does a robot do at the end of one night stand?

He falls off

What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand?

He nuts and bolts.

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

Whats the difference between a washing machine and a woman?

A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it.

How do you turn a washing machine into a snowblower?

Give her a shovel.