What does the caller ID say?

Mom: It's a private caller. Dad: Don't answer that. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.

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Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What do you call a kid who's dad is Jamaican and mom is Chinese?

Rastafriedrice

What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?

A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing."

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What's the song that coldplay wrote for you?

Yellow. *Phil answers phone*

When your partner asks how many people you have ever slept with, answering 'what did I say the last time you asked?

is unwise, apparently.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

How does a black woman know that she's pregnant?

The baby starts picking cotton off her tampons. (aaannnd i'll see myself out)

What u doing later?

Wife: That's not what I meant by pick up my towel. Just hand it to me, idiot.

Rank Jokes More Rank Jokes

How can you spot the rank of a Russian?

By the stripes on his Adidas jumpsuit.

What do you call a top-ranking Mexican dude that oversees everything?

Seor Manager