What happens when the USSR gets back together?

A Soviet Reunion.

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What happens when a soviet and a german have a child?

I don't know but he can conquer poland really fast.

What happens when a pirate turns 60?

He joins AARP

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What does a Russian use to wipe their mouth?

a soviet

Which is the most communist vegetable?

The soviet Onion

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Why didn't the USSR get anything done?

They were Stalin

Who's there ! Bjork ! Bjork who ?

Bjork in the USSR !