What happens when two snails fight?

A: They slug it out.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when the smog rises in Los Angeles...?

UCLA.

What is the worst thing to happen to an anagrammer?

It is to get West Nile in the stew line.

Snail Jokes More Snail Jokes

What did the snail say when he rode a turtle?

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I'll see myself out.

What gas do snails prefer?

Shell.

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

What's worse than fighting an uphill battle?

Getting to the top and realizing it's all downhill from there.

What do you mean I've had enough to drink?

Hold my beer while I fight this lamppost.

Slug Jokes More Slug Jokes

What did the slug say to the snail?

Would you like a copy of the big issue

Why did Bossy slug Roy Rogers?

She heard he was a cowpuncher!