Why did God give women legs?

Because he saw the mess that snails left behind!

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the yogi say to his friends when they asked him to leave?

Nah I'ma stay"

What do dads never forget to include in their "dad" jokes?

PUNctuation Okay, I'll leave.

Snail Jokes More Snail Jokes

What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle?

A. Wheeeee!!!!!

What did one snail say to the other snail?

It...all...happened...soooooooo...fast

Mess Jokes More Mess Jokes

Why is Bruce Wayne's hair messed up?

Because of his cowlick.

Who's there ! Answer ! Answer who ?

Answer all over your porch ! It's a mess out here !

God Jokes More God Jokes

Why don't we say Grace?

Me: I don't know. 5-year-old: Me: 5-year-old: Is it because your cooking makes God angry

How many Atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to actually do it, the other to film it so fundamentalists won't claim that God did it.