What is the best way to talk to a vampire?

By long distance.

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Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Which perfume do you use ?

It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife." Lady: "Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."

Why is everyone talking about me?

They seem mad..." -Temp worker at Foot Locker

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend?

On the front page of reddit.

What is the best way of stopping infection from witch bites ?

Don't bite any witches !

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do you call a vampire in a raincoat ?

Mack-u-la !

Why wasn't the vampire working?

He was on his coffin break.

Long Distance Jokes More Long Distance Jokes

What's got six legs and can fly long distances ?

Three swallows !

What's the difference between an American and a Briton?

Britons think 200 miles is a long distance, and American's think 200 years is a long time.