What kind of bird opens doors ?

A kiwi !

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Door Jokes More Door Jokes

Who's...(loud crash as a battering ram demolishes the front door)...there?

We're the Ferguson Police Department. We ask the questions.

Who's there ! Bettina ! Bettina who ?

Bettina minute you'll open this door !

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What did Bob Marley say to his wife after he opened the fridge?

No, Woman, no pie."

Why does Ed Miliband like advent calendars?

Because it's his only chance to open the door to Number 10!

Bird Jokes More Bird Jokes

Why did the boy carry a clock and a bird on Halloween ?

It was for 'tick or tweet' !

What do you call a bird that speaks Spanish?

A Si-gull

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of chili do they serve at the cannibal prison??

Chili CON Carne!

What kind of ants are very learned ?

Pedants !

Kiwi Jokes More Kiwi Jokes

What do you call a Kiwi with one leg?

Not even bro.

What did the Kiwi say to the Rabbi?

Hebrew".