What mistake did the chronometer make while it was getting along well with the digital watch?

It asked the digital watch for its hand in marriage.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What's the difference between a terrorist cell and a children's hospital?

Don't ask me man, I just fly the drones.

What did the Canadian eel say when the bartender asked him if he'd had enough?

No, I think I'd like some more-ay.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What is the best music to air drum to while driving?

Def Leppard, because you can keep on hand on the wheel.

What did the kid with no hands get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding he couldn't open it to find out

Mistake Jokes More Mistake Jokes

What do you call it when a pickle makes a mistake?

A dill d'oh

How many tax auditors does it take to find a $1.00 mistake in an expense report?

Three. One to find the mistake and two to discuss the significance of it.

Marriage Jokes More Marriage Jokes

How is marriage and CPR training the same?

You get a certificate for showing you can do it and hope to god you never have to do it again

What starts out happy but ends in tears?

Marriage