When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why fist fights break out at NASA?

Sometimes an argument of perihelion will get out of hand.

What's the difference between a psychotic mental patient and a man with a bible in his hand?

Respiridol

Judge Jokes More Judge Jokes

When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

What do you call a judge with no left hand and left leg?

He is alright, but one sided!

English Jokes More English Jokes

What does one call an undertaker that's been drafted into the Military?

A Corpseman. Painfully obvious, yet a terrible play on the English language, I know. It was something I came up with a few years ago, for some unknown reason.

Whatchya thinking about?

Me: *Thinking about how dogs understand more English words than I understand dog words* Science stuff.

English Teacher Jokes More English Teacher Jokes

Why did the English teacher hire a midget geography nut as his lawyer?

He wanted someone who understood and case.

What did the English teacher write when she needed to borrow money?

An AE I.O.U. P.S. Im proud of this one :3

Long Sentence Jokes More Long Sentence Jokes

When is an English teacher like a judge?

When she hands out long sentences.

What is the longest sentence that a man can make?

I do.