Why are shopaholics in the UK generally very skinny?

Because they are always losing pounds.

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Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election?

He TANKED his campaign!

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What happens when two dogs breed in a pound?

Dog pound dog pounds dog pound dog.

What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?

A: About fifty pounds.

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Which UK party will the sleeping pigs be voting for in May?

The Lay-Boar Party.

What's the difference between Hillary's e-mails and the UK leaving the EU?

Hillary got off Scott-free.

Shopaholic Jokes More Shopaholic Jokes

Why are shopaholics in the UK generally very skinny?

Because they are always losing pounds.

Why are shopaholics so hard to help?

They can be very "clothes"-minded about the problem.