How do you know that a plane from the UK has landed?

An hour after its landed its still whining.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Did you know that protons have mass?

I didn't even know they were catholic.

Why are rubber tires black?

So the police know what to shoot at during a chase

Land Jokes More Land Jokes

Why are sailors so impatient when they get on land?

Because they're tired of waiting in the rhumb line.

What did the pig do when a beetle landed in his feed trough?

He ate it quickly before the others could ask him to share.

Plane Jokes More Plane Jokes

What did you have on the wings of your plane?

Holes mostly..."

What can conspiracy theorists never explain?

They say that 9/11 was an inside job... but planes fly OUTSIDE. Can't explain that

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

What do white guys do that lasts hours and makes white women scream?

NASCAR

Who's your Daddy?

In my excitement, I asked my girlfriend "How's your daddy " instead of "Who's your daddy " and now five hours later we're still talking about his diabetes...

Whine Jokes More Whine Jokes

What do you call a worker in America that will work hard for reasonable pay and never whine?

An immigrant.**

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

Uk Jokes More Uk Jokes

How can you tell that microchips are made in the US and not the UK?

Because if they were made in the UK they would be called microcrisps.

Why was the UKIP voter angry?

Because he didn't like the look of the Poles (for this to make sense, pretend the UK election hasn't happened yet)