Why are you always rushing out of here after work?

You're single with no kids." Me: " Exactly."

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just kidding, you can't change anything in the United States.

How do Chinese name their kids?

They throw silverware on the ground!

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What did the constipated mathematician do?

He worked it out with a pencil.

Why wasn't Daredevil in Civil War?

He doesn't work well with Vision

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

What do you think you're doing driving through that intersection fifty miles an hour?

Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.

How do the Russians invade the Ukraine?

They rush in.