Why couldn't the sailors play cards?

Because the Captain was stood on the deck!

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why does the Asian News Anchor not stand up from behind his desk during presidential races?

because he's covering an erection!

Why did Oscar Pistorius lose his court case?

He hadn't got a leg to stand on.

Captain Jokes More Captain Jokes

How does captain hook cook pita bread?

With a pita pan.

What's the difference between a captain and a lt.col ?

A major difference.

Sailor Jokes More Sailor Jokes

How well did the sailor do in school?

Not bad actually, he got high 'C's.

Why did the sailor ground his son?

His grades were below sea level