Why did Gandalf have to go to the hospital to get a splinter removed?

He had a staff infection...

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Hospital Jokes More Hospital Jokes

Who's the coolest guy at the hospital?

The ultra sound guy.

What do you call it when you can't decide between a natural birth and the hospital?

A midwife crisis.

Gandalf Jokes More Gandalf Jokes

What does the high elves call Gandalf?

Methrandir

Why did Gandalf never listen to the song "Dream Police"?

Because he was no conjurer of Cheap Trick

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

Why don't you want to win an award for Best Feline Sphincter?

Because it's a catastrophe :-) Yeah, ok, I'll be going now. EDIT: removed explanation.

Why was Hillary thrown out of a restaurant?

She trashed the bill. Alt punch line 1 (u/Causative): She demanded her own private server and tried to have her meals removed.

Splinter Jokes More Splinter Jokes

Why didn't the mother splinter call her son on his birth-day?

Because he's a little prick!

Why are the Ninja Turtles on the No-Fly list?

Because they are members of an underground Splinter cell.

Staff Infection Jokes More Staff Infection Jokes

What is a sorcerer's least favorite disease?

A staff infection

Why did Gandalf have to go to the hospital to get a splinter removed?

He had a staff infection...