Why did Maria Shriver marry Arnold Schwarzenegger?

To breed a Kennedy that could take a bullet.

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Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

What's the difference between officer Darren Wilson and Michael Brown?

Officer Wilson can dodge a bullet

What was the last thing that went through the Sandy Hook child's mind?

A bullet. I apologize if that joke was aimed for a younger audience. I love Sandy Hook jokes, they never get old. Just like those children.

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

What did the melon say to his daughter after she tried to get married?

You cant-elope!

What do cows do after they get married?

They go on their honeymoooooon!

Breed Jokes More Breed Jokes

Why does the baker have so many loaves?

Because they bred.

What do you call children born of ginger people?

Ginger-bred

Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes More Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger do after he retired?

He became an ex-terminator!

How would Arnold Schwarzenegger describe a sousaphone?

It's not a tuba!"

Kennedy Jokes More Kennedy Jokes

Why did President Kennedy never get drunk?

He wasn't very good at taking shots.

Why did Kennedy throw his head back?

He was taking a shot.