Why did Maria Shriver marry Arnold Schwarzenegger?

To breed a Kennedy that could take a bullet.

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Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

Who is the prettiest of my friends?

Me: your mother, why W: Stop acting like you're 12. M: (thinking) I dodged that bullet again.

What is Oscar Pistorius's new favourite band?

Bullets For My Valentine

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

Why do tennis players never get married?

Because Love means nothing to them.

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Breed Jokes More Breed Jokes

How many pandas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Technically, just two, but it is really hard to get them to breed in captivity.

Why does the baker have so many loaves?

Because they bred.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes More Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes

What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite kind of jacket?

A Pullover!

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he and his friends decided to dress up as famous composers for Halloween?

I'll be Bach

Kennedy Jokes More Kennedy Jokes

Why did Maria Shriver marry Arnold Schwarzenegger?

To breed a Kennedy that could take a bullet.

Why did Kennedy throw his head back?

He was taking a shot.