Why did the dislocated finger leave the party?

He felt really out of place.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the farmer's house catch on fire?

He left his home on the range.

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

How did the midget feel when he found out he was retarded?

A little Down.

What does a pirate's beard feel like?

Corsair. (works better in a pirate accent)

Party Jokes More Party Jokes

How does NASA organize a party?

They planet.

Why are chickens never invited to the party?

They are always party fowls.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

How long have I got?

Not long. Two, three months" casually places apple on desk "Ok, ok, six. Just get that out of here!"

What did the cremated Buddha who was placed in a cardboard box say?

I'm in light urn.'