Why didn't you obey that stop sign?

Driver: I don't believe everything I read.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why do people walk by and say "Hi, how are you?

but they don't stop long enough for you to reply!

How did Jesus get across Jerusalem on a busy Friday afternoon?

Cross traffic doesn't stop.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why do liberals travel in threes?

A: One to read one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.

How much would you say you read the Bible?

Well, I don't read it religiously." Bud-dum tss, I hate myself.

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What were the martyr's last words?

I believe in peace in our time

What do you call an old-school CIA agent who believes his work is none of the public's goddamn business?

A Pte-redact-yl

Obey Jokes More Obey Jokes

How long does it take for stormtroopers to obey Kylo Ren?

Just the First Order.

What artistic dog chews a lot and follows the rules of the farm where it lives?

A Chihuahua that can draw and gnaw while obeying the law and lying on straw!