Why does my shampoo smell like gasoline?

And when did my wife start smoking

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why do you want to be buried at sea?

Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave.

How many beers is that for you today, dear?

Me: Like 4 maybe. 5 tops. Wife: I counted 19. Me: Well I rounded down.

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

How do you know that someone likes to smoke weed?

Don't worry they'll tell you.

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How is digging fence post holes like being the mayor of Toronto?

It goes pretty smoothly until you start hitting the rock.

How do you start a rave in Ethopia???

You staple food on the ceilings.

Gasoline Jokes More Gasoline Jokes

How do you make a cat sounds like a dog?

Douse it in gasoline and set it on fire. !

Why does my shampoo smell like gasoline?

And when did my wife start smoking