How do you get someone with a doctorate in philosophy to leave your house?

Just pay for your pizza.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did Bill Gates get sick?

Because he left the Windows open.

Why are you naked & why is Greg under your desk?

Me: Boss: Me: Shut the door when you leave

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What do you call it when someone gets hit by a bus on his way to pay off his student loans?

Crippling debt! It's funny because he can't walk anymore!

What's your five-year goal?

Me: Paid administrative leave.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How did I get here?

I'm sure my neighbors ask the same question every time they catch me in their house...taking a shower.

What kind of house does a stoned loaf of bread live in?

A high rise

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

Whats the difference between a woman president and pizza?

Most people like the idea of pizza better.

What do Mexicans use to cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.

Philosophy Jokes More Philosophy Jokes

What do you call the corner of the market that specializes in philosophy?

A Nietzsche market!

What kind of a friar loves philosophy?

A deep friar.

Doctorate Jokes More Doctorate Jokes

How do you get someone with a doctorate in philosophy to leave your house?

Just pay for your pizza.

What do you call a Tungsten Holmium compound with a Doctorate?

Doctor WHo