How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?

When she starts her sentence with, "A man once told me..."

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the best thing about living in Switzerland?

I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.

What is the distinction between a man that has had a vasectomy and one who hasn't?

I don't know, as far as I'm concerned there's not a vas deferens.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you start a rave in Africa?

Glue a piece of toast to the ceiling

Why did the man hit the fortune teller when she started laughing?

A: He was striking a happy medium.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did a man bring a ladder to the party?

He heard the drinks were on the house..... I'll see myself out.

What did the Psychiatrist say to the man who walked in wearing nothing but plastic wrap?

I can clearly see ur nuts.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What is the difference between dragons and dinosaurs?

Dinosaurs aren't old enough to smoke. Told to me by my niece at christmas.

Why were the 5 gorgeous young blonde Danish fashion models sobbing their eyes out?

I told them I wasn't going to give birth to them.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What is the difference between a boat and a woman?

The boat cuts through the water, a woman waters through the cut.

What's 3 inches long and pleases all women?

A credit card.

Sentence Jokes More Sentence Jokes

Whatcha got, reddit?

I am not funny and I need to be. I am writing a script for a short show that's formatted like "Weekend Update" on Saturday Night Live. So that means one sentence about the topic, and then one liner joke. Thank you all!

Why was Jared Fogle upset?

Because he was sentenced to over 15 years in prison.