How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What's worse than dropping a scope of ice cream?

Dropping 2 scoops of ice cream. What's worse than dropping 2 scoops of ice cream? Getting a hand chopped off. What's worse than getting a hand chopped off? Getting both hands chopped off. What's worse than getting both hands chopped off? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping 3 scoops of ice cream.

Why is Jesus bad at crossword puzzles?

He always gets stuck on 2 Across.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why shouldn't you tell a philosophy major a joke?

They don't find them Hume-erous.

What signal tells you that a politician is lying?

The lips are moving

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

How many McDonald's counter girls does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to put some chips with it.

Why didn't Michael J Fox order food at McDonalds?

He got the shakes instead.

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

Why did the rabbit run out of the fast-food restaurant?

He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on a toasted bunny.

What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection?

Quarter-pounder with cheese

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?

Because a sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

How Do You Tell 2 Scottsmen Apart?

A: You lift their kilts, and whichever one has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!!

Lift Jokes More Lift Jokes

How can you tell when there's an elephant in your sandwich?

When it's too heavy to lift.

How did the Hulk feel after trying to lift Mjolnir?

He felt Thor.