How is your job and your wife different?

I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

How does the redneck help his wife with the dishes?

He gets her Dawn.

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

Why shouldn't you talk to someone with a brain tumor?

because they've got a lot on their mind.

Why does Daenerys Targaryen listen to Hoagy Carmichael?

Because she's got Jorah on Her Mind.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays?

They can wear casual clothes to work

What did the buffalo say to his boy before leaving for work?

Bye, son.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you call a Hispanic woman with no legs?

Consuelo! My mother told me this one

How do you tell if someone is ticklish?

Testicles.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How bad is the economy?

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Today we have no cash, no hope and no jobs.

What did the sarcastic taximan say when he lost his job?

Oh well that's just uber, isn't it