How many Heisenbergs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

If you know the number, you don't know where the socket is.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know when you're too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and realize it was your air freshener

How do you know when a vampire is sick?

He starts coffin...

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella. How long does it take them Days.

How many SRSers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They wait for the electrician to make a mistake and yell at them for doing it wrong.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)

How many monkeys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Monkeys screw in trees.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

What did the man say who couldn't add the same number to itself?

I can't even...

What's the current number one song in Russia?

Crimea river

Socket Jokes More Socket Jokes

How many narcissists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One narcissist. The narcissist holds the lightbulb in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him.

How does a feminist screw in a light bulb?

She doesn't, she just holds it in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her.