How many house flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just the standard two, but I'll be damned if I know how they got in there.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What did C.S. Lewis say about The Lord of the Rings books?

I don't know what you're Tolkien about!" Yeah, sorry.. I know it's dumb.

How did people know Patrick Stewart was crying?

Because he bawled.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One because his knee grows.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Light bulb.

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What's a Jackhammer's Best Friend?

Cast Steel! Bahahahahah! You know! Cause it has a poor dampening value it vibrates so much! They um. They both vibrate. Well ok. One vibrates, the other reciprocates. That's kinda... Hehe. Heh. Reciprocate my humor damn it!

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb?

This is a joke I came up with. Q: How many religious people does it take to change a light bulb? A: There's no need to change it when you can easily convince everyone that it still works, but they've gone blind.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it.