What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

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What do you call soup that you've found a hair in?

Rabbit Soup :D

How did the farmer find his lost cow?

He tractor down

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What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

What's Snoop Dogg's favorite time of day?

Tree O'clock!

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad sky diver?

The bad golfer goes ::Whack:: "Damn it!" The bad sky diver goes "Damn it!" ::Whack::

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What was the last thing that went through Paul Walker's mind before he died?

The windshield.

How can you tell when a Canadian is successful?

He dies in his LA home at 82.

Atheist Jokes More Atheist Jokes

How can you tell someone's an atheist?

You can't. They'll always tell you first.

Why did the atheist fail algebra?

He didn't believe in higher powers!

Pearly Gates Jokes More Pearly Gates Jokes

What does the atheist say when he arrives at the Pearly Gates?

I'll be goddamned.

What did the atheist say when he found himself at the Pearly Gates the day he died?

Well I'll be damned!