What did they say about the guy who wok...

Why is the last chapter in a chemistry textbook about benzene?

Because it's the PHENYL CHAPTER :D I came up with this myself. I'm so proud.

How does a blonde set the time on her alarm clock?

She waits until midnight and plugs it back in. Disclaimer: I know it's terrible, I was very young when I came up with it.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Why can't Brock Turner go to jail?

Because with swim times like his, he might be president some day.

Why are bats blind?

Well your eyesight wouldn't be too good if you hung upside down all day would it

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why, with twice the population of the United States at the time didn't China invent the airplane first?

Well, two Wongs don't make a Wright.

Who is Superman's brother?

Supperman. Or his kid Soup-erman. One just gets to dinner on time and the other is really good and making soup. E: I thought of it in it in a dream so thats why its not so good

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

Why did the guy cut a hole in his carpet?

He wanted to watch the floor show. And why did he cover it back up ...He realized that he didn't want to watch the "hole" show.

What do you call a guy in a suit sitting in a tree?

Branch Manager

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What's long and hard every time you wake up?

Getting out of bed. You never feel like it making hard to get up and you usually take a long time to.

What do necrophiliacs get when they wake up on the day of a funeral?

Mourning Wood

Jerk Jokes More Jerk Jokes

What did the Seven Dwarfs say when the prince woke up Snow White?

Welp.... I guess it's back to jerking off!

What do you call a jerking off well-endowed midget?

A huge short coming.

Alarm Clock Jokes More Alarm Clock Jokes

What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock?

You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...