What did one eye say to the other eye?

Between you and me, something smells. Credit: Christmas cracker.

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Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

Why didn't the tree get any presents for Christmas?

He was knotty.

What does a homeless man gets for Christmas?

A cold.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What's green and bad for your eyes?

An alligator.

How does the chef prepare the chicken?

The waiter replies, "He looks it straight in the eye and says, 'You're gonna die.'"

Credit Jokes More Credit Jokes

How does the drug addict know the cocaine is good quality?

He just nose. All credit to my BFF

Why is Windows going from 8 to 10?

Because 7 ate 9. Credit to a guy I work with.

Christmas Cracker Jokes More Christmas Cracker Jokes

What Do You Call A Line Of Men Waiting For A Haircut?

A Barbecue. Christmas crackers are just full of laughs.

What did the sea say to the shore?

Nothing, he just waved. Christmas crackers are the worst.