What did Orion receive when he won second place in the archery contest?

The constellation prize.

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Why doesn't Mexico win Olympic Medals?

Because all their best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America.

What did the Australian say when he won a game of chess?

Cheers, mate.

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What do you have when you are having second thoughts about your booking on Native American land?

Reservation reservation reservations.

What do the racehorse that finished in second and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both came in a little behind.

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What's better than getting second place at the special Olympics?

Not being retarded

What do a Catholic Priest and second place have in common?

They both came in a little behind.

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What did the 11 year old junior paleontologist and 50-cent music lover with cancer receive from the one wish foundation?

A Rap Tour

Why did Alexander Graham Bell never receive a nobel prize?

Because it's a "no bell" prize.