What did the emu say to the nurse?

A: Mend her bones or walk the plank

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Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What did the doctor say to the man who walked off the roof of his house?

I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.

How, you ask?

I walked into an autopsy. It was stiff.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

Why can't an IT guy be a doctor?

Nurse: Doctor, the patient's life support is acting strange. . . Doctor: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Why did the nurse always insist on using the rectal thermometer to obtain temperatures?

Because nurses are taught in nursing school to always look for her patient's best side.

Bone Jokes More Bone Jokes

Why do dogs bury bones in the ground ?

Because you can't bury them in trees !

What do you call it when George Thorogood farts on a throne?

Air to the bone

Plank Jokes More Plank Jokes

What do you call a dead body and two planks?

A "Build your own Jesus" kit.

What did the emu say to the nurse?

A: Mend her bones or walk the plank

Mend Jokes More Mend Jokes

What's the difference between someone who can mend your pants quick and a famous singer?

One of them is a swift tailor.

What did the emu say to the nurse?

A: Mend her bones or walk the plank

Emu Jokes More Emu Jokes

How did the emu feel when his friends disowned him for being too big?

Ostrich-sized.

What is the square route of an EMU?

A RADICAL EMU!!!!!!