What did the guy who got fired for always being late say?

It was just a matter of time.

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why would you put a baby in a blender feet first?

So you can make dinner and get head at the same time.

Why did the kid throw the watch out the window?

So time would fly.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What did the U.S president say before starting WW3?

Nukes... You're fired!

Why was Bob Marley fired from being a tennis announcer?

Because he kept calling "One Love"

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What did the Machop say to the guy who was giving him a hard time?

You're really bustin' Machops!

What do you call two guys on a pair of curtains?

Kurt n Rod.

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

What did the nihilist say to the physicist?

Nevermind, it doesn't really matter.

What kind of speech did the farmer give his cornfield?

It didn't matter, they were all ears