What do Congressional Republicans and ISIS in Afghanistan have in common?

Their first act since arriving was to go after the elderly.

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Isis Jokes More Isis Jokes

Why is ISIS so good at sports?

Even in high-intensity games they always manage to execute

What will be on the Denny's Menu when ISIS takes over?

The Grand I-slam

Afghanistan Jokes More Afghanistan Jokes

Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan?

Because there are already too many targets. (credit: some old veteran bum looking guy sleeping on a bench at the police station I went to today.)

Why is it so hard to keep track of counting in Afghanistan?

Because of the Taliban (say it out loud)

Arrive Jokes More Arrive Jokes

What's the difference between a train and SONY?

When the train announces an arriving "Station", you can see it.

What do you call that feeling when the bus finally arrives?

a peasantfeeling

Republican Jokes More Republican Jokes

Why is Monica Lewinsky going to vote Republican this year?

Last time she tried Democrat it left a bad taste in her mouth.

Why Republicans cannot swim as freely as they want?

Dems!

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

What do you call it when a person acts holy for a night then sins every day after?

A one night stand with Jesus

What do you get when you cross dancing and an act of god?

Deus Ex Macarena