A Popsicle.
You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.
How will I ever find another performer of your caliber? (Source: a dad on thanksgiving)
They always fall back on old habits.
Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!
I ask on twitter because googling it gets people caught.
Polaroids
Here is mine: Q: Where do snowmen dance --------- A: At the snowball. Best joke at the end of a Popsicle stick