What do you call a Mustard that keeps remembering things that haven't happened yet?

dijon-vu mustard... (Sorry)

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens once in a minute and twice in a moment but never in a decade?

A: The letter "m."

Why happened when the cat swallowed a coin ?

There was some money in the kitty !

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How do I stay humble?

Well, it's not easy, but I start by being generally bad at almost all things.

Why do they put half of the instructions in Spanish?

It drives me crazy. I feel like I am missing out on important information. They should put the whole thing in one language.

Mustard Jokes More Mustard Jokes

What did the guy who liked mustard say when he opened his fridge and saw no mustard?

You mustard be joking!

Why is the whole battalion yellow and slimy?

Me: I mustard the troops. General: ... Me: Just as you told me to, sir.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What happens on the first date with Bill Cosby?

I don't remember

How did the hippie remember the number of wives he had?

He counted 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, 4 Mississippi...