What food do vampires hate?

Steaks.

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Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why was the Queen of Horses hated by her subjects?

Because she was too ahoof.

Why do ISIS fighters only drink instant coffee?

Because they hate the French Press. (This joke used to be more topical)

Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

Why are the steaks so high?

Because the pot was calling the cattle back and the cows went back to the marijuana field.

What if a man existed w/one hand that's a steak and the other is lobster plus unlimited salad bar?

This is the plot of Edward Sizzlerhands

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

What do you call it when you turn into a vampire before being bitten?

Premature Edraculation

What do you call it when you stab a vampire in the lungs?

A miss stake

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What do dark jokes and food have in common?

Not everyone gets them

Whole Foods?

Ripped off.