What is a surgeon's excuse for not wearing a condom?

Don't worry baby, I'm sterile.

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Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?

A baby with a punctured lung

What is love?

Baby don't hurt me.

Condom Jokes More Condom Jokes

What are the most useless items ever invented?

A: Condoms. If you need one, she's too old.

Why did the Irishman wear two condoms?

To be sure to be sure

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What did the reindeer wear to protect itself while Santa was watering the garden?

Rudolph's red hose rain gear...

Who has a long nose wears a mask and sits tall in the saddle?

The Lone Aardvark!

Worry Jokes More Worry Jokes

What do you call a thirsty cow?

A watermeloin.. Don't worry, I remember where the door is.

How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.