What's the best way for an American to lose weight?

Gamble in British currency.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did the Russians lose the space race?

Their rocket kept Stalin!

How long does it take a baby to die in the microwave?

I don't know, I lose track of time when I have an erection.

American Jokes More American Jokes

What kind of game are Americans worst at?

Tower defense.

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just kidding, you can't change anything in the United States.

Weight Jokes More Weight Jokes

Why do you keep talking about my weight behind my back?

Husband: Because when I get round to the front I've forgotten what I was going to say

Why is the physicist not worried about his weight?

Because m = AIt

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What is the best way of stopping infection from witch bites ?

Don't bite any witches !

What's the best way for a lady to read 50 Shades of Grey?

To flick through it as fast as possible.

British Jokes More British Jokes

What's the difference between a tea cup and pea cup?

A teacup is what the British drink out of and a pea cup is what the Mexicans drive.

How do you find a British person in a crowd?

1. Shout 0800 00 2. Wait for them to shout 1066.