What's the difference between a football player and a bank robber?

The bank robber says: Give me the money or I will shoot! The football player says: Give me the money or I won't shoot.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

How can you tell the difference between a catholic, a baptist, and a Methodist?

A baptist will run into a liquor store, buy their alcohol and run out. A Methodist will walk into a liquor store and say high to everyone, then buy their alcohol and walk out. A catholic will show up to the store completely hammered, hug everyone, get their alcohol and stumble their way out of the store.

What is the difference between Courtney Love and a porcupine?

A porcupines needle won't give you AIDS

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why are school shooters more likely to be white people?

White people actually go to school. Black people stay home and shoot people in their own neighborhood.

How do you make two Oboists play in tune with one another?

Shoot one of them.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

Why do you want to work in a bank Alan?

Fred: 'Cuz there's money in it sir.

Where does Santa stash his money?

In a snowbank.

Football Player Jokes More Football Player Jokes

Why did the football player laugh when he broke his arm?

Because it was humerus.

How does a football player make phone calls?

On a touch-down phone.

Bank Robber Jokes More Bank Robber Jokes

Why did the bank robber go to the chiropractor?

Because he had a crook in his neck.

What's the difference between a football player and a bank robber?

The bank robber says: Give me the money or I will shoot! The football player says: Give me the money or I won't shoot.