What's the difference between a frog and a horny toad?

One goes "ribbit ribbit", the other goes "rub it rub it".

This joke may have profanity.

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What's the difference between my Grandma and the FBI?

My Grandma can unlock an iphone.

Whats the difference between a woman and a feminist?

A woman can understand irony and satire without being offended.

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What did Kermit the Frog say at Jim Henson's funeral?

Nothing.

Why was Miss Piggy sick for her show?

There was a frog in her throat.

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Rub Jokes More Rub Jokes

What do you do for a pig with sore muscles?

Rub him with oinkment.

Why was there never an Aladdin 4?

Because he kept on rubbing the wrong lamp.