What's the difference between a turtle and a tortoise?

I don't know but your mother's a whore!

This joke may have profanity.
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What's the difference between a gamer and a pot of boiling water?

A pot of boiling water doesn't get salty when you put a tea-bag in it.

What's the difference between a Mexican joke and a black joke?

Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal

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How do you know your S&amp?

M partner works in IT? They insist your safe word has an upper case letter, a lower case letter, and at least one number.

How do you know when an introvert is interested in you?

They are looking at your shoes, rather than their own.

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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

What's green and has four wheels?

A turtle. I was lying about the wheels

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What did the snail say while riding on the back of the tortoise?

Wheeeee!!!! --hey, at least it's a fun joke for kids!

What does a balding man and a tortoise have in common?

Hare loss.