When Lil John goes to a hotel and they ask him if he wants turn down service, does he refuse?

That's all.

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What did you do before you were married sir?

A: *with teary eyes* whatever the hell i wanted to do ...

What do you call a hump-backed cow that always wants to be the center of attention?

A drama-dairy.

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What did Shakespeare ask his doctor when he was afraid he had tuberculosis?

TB or not TB, that is the question.

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Tell her you refuse to allow her to make you a sandwich.

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Which service do you require?

Me: Oh! Don't mind me, I was just cleaning cake off the touch screen.

When is the only time when No shirt no shorts no shoes gets you service?

If you're a surfer and you're getting head.

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Why did the Italian get thrown out of the hotel?

He said "I wanna two sheet onna the bed".

Why did you offer me a piece of candy?

Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the hotel.