Whole Foods Cashier: Do you have your grocery bags?

Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What is that behind your ear?

Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"

Why can't Stevie Wonder see his kids?

Because he's black.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why do single women take advice from other single women?

That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions

Why aren't you allowed alcohol on a golf course?

Because it's a crime to drink and drive.

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What did the banana say to the apple?

Nothing. Fruits can't talk. Idiot.

Why doesn't Ebola harm fruit?

Because if it affected an Apple it'd be called I-Bola.

Apple Pie Jokes More Apple Pie Jokes

Whole Foods Cashier: Do you have your grocery bags?

Me: Kidding At $6 an apple you should drive them home and make an apple pie for me.

What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie ?

Puff pastry !

Grocery Bag Jokes More Grocery Bag Jokes

What is the difference between michael jackson and a grocery bag?

One is white, plastic, and dangerous for your kids to play with and the other holds your groceries

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

one is plastic and dangerous for your kids to play with, the other holds your groceries