Why'd the farmer win the lifetime achievement award?

Because he was always out standing in his field.

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Field Jokes More Field Jokes

What is the hardest thing about walking through a field of dead babies?

My erection.

What's the worst thing about a September harvest?

Finding a plane in your field.

Farmer Jokes More Farmer Jokes

What did the cow say to the farmer named Mitch?

Moo Mitch, get out the hay

What do you call a farmer who is really good at his job?

A man who is outstanding in his field.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How can you tell when an idiot's depressed?

Go stand in front of a mirror

What's the only thing politicians stand for?

Reelection.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why was Harry Potter surprised when Ferrari won the F1 race?

Because he expecto'd Petronas.

What do the NBA and the presidential election have in common?

There's only two candidates, and nobody wants either of them to win!