Why did Apple employee get away jacking off in the office?

Because there are no windows!

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Window Jokes More Window Jokes

Why did a man throw his breakfast out the window?

He was a cereal defenestrator.

Why do vampire's use linux?

Because they don't like windows in their house. BaDumTss

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What did the apple tell the annoying orange?

Citrus down.

What did Samsung say to Apple?

You don't no jack!

Jack Jokes More Jack Jokes

What do you call a British circle jerk?

A Union Jack.

Whats an iPhone 7's favorite brand of frozen pizza?

Not Jack's.

Office Jokes More Office Jokes

How would you improve our business?

Dude, I'd bankrupt you in a week. I'm just catchin Pokemon in your office."

How can you tell if a blonde works in an office?

A: A bed in the stockroom and huge smiles on all the bosses' faces.

Apple Employee Jokes More Apple Employee Jokes

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, because they charge you $500 for the iLightbulb.

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A lot, apparently. Have you seen their new building?