Why did John keep on finding cracker crumbs in his bed?

His wife didn't know any decent crackers.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What should you do if you find a snake in your bed?

Sleep in the wardrobe.

Why was the Police Officer still in bed?

Because he was .

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do you call a Muslim Girl dating an Agnostic Guy?

For safety purposes, I don't know if I should tell you her name..

Why don't Pokemon cards ever have any typos?

Because the editors know that they gotta catch 'em all!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did Bob Marley say to his wife after he opened the fridge?

No, Woman, no pie."

How's the ventriloquism going?

ME: Not good. WIFE: But I got you that Ventriloquism For Dummies book. ME: I don't think he read it.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why did the bad demon burn after finding the length it took to rise diagonally from hell?

cos' sin tans

Why was Heisenberg such a bad lover?

A: When he got the momentum, he couldn't find the position, and when he found the position, he couldn't muster up the momentum.

John Jokes More John Jokes

What do you call an American with a lavatory on his head ?

John.

What did Mr. Cena's fiancee say on their wedding day?

No, John! *You* can't see *me!*