Why did the Italian wear handcuffs to bed?

So he wouldn't talk in his sleep

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why does the nudist always go to bed early?

Because he never sleeps in much!

When is it time for bed at the Neverland Ranch?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do Jimmy Saville's victims and Aston Villa fans have in common?

They're still talking about what happened in 1982.

Why can't dinosaurs talk?

Because they're all dead.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What do you call a turtle who sleeps during the day and is awake at night?

Nocturtle

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What do you get when you cross an (italian) with a gorilla?

A retarded gorilla. (Can be modified to offend any nationality or group)

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do mermaids wear seashells for a bra?

Because "B" shells would be too small!

How do you know a homeless woman is menstruating?

If she's only wearing one sock. (This joke brought to you courtesy the homeless guy outside my local 7-11.) Edit: tweaked the punchline.

Handcuff Jokes More Handcuff Jokes

Why do Mexicans always install those tiny steering wheels in their cars?

So they can drive with the handcuffs on.

Why do Mexican cars have such small steering wheels?

So they can be driven while handcuffed.