What does a carpenter do after one night stand?

A matching one for the other side of the bed.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

When I bring you breakfast in bed, why can't you just say "thank you"?

instead of all this "how did you get in to my house " calling 9-11 business.

Why doesn't anyone get laid on Thanksgiving?

All the coats are on the bed!

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you call a bunch of tractors parked in front of a McDonald's on Friday night in Wisconsin?

Prom night.

What do you get if you mix up together an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac?

A guy who is up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Night Stand Jokes More Night Stand Jokes

Why doesn't Kirk like to have one-night stands?

Because the girls always cling on him afterwards.

What do you do when your one night stand doesn't take Plan B?

Plan C-ya.

Match Jokes More Match Jokes

Why are almost all brides dresses white?

So the dishwasher matches the washing machine

Why does the bride always wear white?

Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.

Carpenter Jokes More Carpenter Jokes

What happens when a carpenter drinks with his wife?

He gets hammered and she gets nailed.

What does a carpenter do after one night stand?

A matching one for the other side of the bed.