Why do you carry a knife?

Knife Jokes More Knife Jokes

Why did I carve a heart with me and my boyfriends initials into a tree?

To sharpen the knife

What did the knife say to the pretty lady?

Nothing, she knew what was coming...

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

How is Santa able to carry so many presents at once?

Santa isn't real.

Why do police in the US carry a tazer and pepper spray?

In case they run out of bullets.

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

How do you hide money from a hippie?

Put it under the soap.

Why do elephants paint their testicles red?

So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Shows you it works then. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys picking cherries.

Sword Jokes More Sword Jokes

Me: A sword is harder to hide.

What do you get when an epileptic person fights an iceberg with a sword?

Seizure Salad