Why does the Catholic Church have so much money?

Because Jesus saves.

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Whoa. There are books on TAPE?

Now I can stop reading while I drive. This is gonna save so many lives.

Why isn't the guy who wrote "Danger Zone" and the Saved by the Bell theme very active on social media?

He forgot his Loggins

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What is Jesus's favorite gun?

A nail gun.

Why did Jesus get all the ladies?

Because he was hung like this (extends arms to sides)

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What do old cars and dead chickens have in common?

You'll usually get more money for them if you sell them for parts

What does a successful CS:GO bettor spend the money on?

Vacation.

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Why does the Catholic Church have so much money?

Because Jesus saves.

What is the Catholic Church giving up for Lent?

Answer: The Pope!